I often remind you that my trances are changing you. I’ve also said that hypnosis can have a rebound effect. So on my birthday, I’d just like to reflect on how this work has altered me over the years.
One of the curses and blessings of sentience is that we’re all fascinated with how our minds work. I’m no exception. The hypnofetish world was inevitably going to snare me, and now that I’m in it, there is no upper limit to exploration. When I Domme, I often grow bored with one niche and move on. I’ve never reached the end of this particular path.
While writing hypnosis clips, I allow myself to experience the things that I’m asking you to experience. I’ll read inductions aloud to myself and let them work on me. Or I’ll pause, close my eyes, and let myself feel the heaviness, the calm, the arousal.
This has had a profound effect on my observation of my own mind. I’ve practiced meditation for about a decade and a half, which sounds very disciplined of me, doesn’t it? In reality, it means I’ve spent 15 years fidgeting on a cushion while wrestling with my own thoughts, and usually (somehow) losing. My skills of self-observation leveled up when I began hypnotizing others. Because I was walking others through my own meditative techniques, I had to be able to truly put myself there.
When I’m asking you to dig deep in the darkest corners of your mind, it’s only because I’m doing the same. A good D/s dynamic grows in parallel. My trances have evolved, and my thinking has evolved alongside them.
Through my work, I’ve become deeply connected with strangers — but only across a single facet. We don’t share any ties beyond trance, but that link is more revealing than, say, a mutual liking for Mongolian folk-metal.
I use hypnosis to expose your psyche. And mine is exposed to you in the structure, the concepts, the words. We may have little else in common, but there is something powerful about that willing exchange of vulnerability. That’s why I test my trances on myself: I want to understand what I’m asking you to feel, and the basic desires that lie beneath.
Vulnerability goes hand-in-hand with authenticity. As I’ve asked for more of the former, I’ve tried to offer more of the latter. I used to say that hypnosis was an excellent tool for D/s play; a catalyst with which to gain power. Now I see more of an elaborate dance between the two.
As I understand more about the hidden parts of the mind, they take a more central role in my work. It’s delightful to get a secret fantasy out of an entranced hypnosub, so imagine how it feels when I can tease out their deepest existential fears.
Thus, enter me, dancing around your mind after you listen to a clip. Do I turn you on? Do you fear death? Do you want to serve Me? Do you still believe in a static self? Aren’t my tits amazing?
For whatever reason, you’ve all joined me on this strange journey. I’m grateful for the work I do, and I’m grateful for those of you who have followed me here.